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Christmas updates

Posted by Meredith Goldstein  December 25, 2012 09:18 AM

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Merry Christmas. We have three updates today.

The first is from someone who had issues with spark.

Hello Meredith,

I'm writing to update you. Definitely have more perspective on the break-up now. I still miss him occasionally (I'm often surprised at how much I miss him after so much time ...) but I am moving on. Dating a lot, and while I haven't found someone who makes me feel "sparkly" like he did, I'm still hopeful that someone out there will give me butterflies again! On a positive note, I also never realized how strong I was until after this break-up AND it's only helped me better define what I want/don't want in a relationship.

Happy Holidays All!

And now an update from someone who was anxious.

Hi Meredith,

Sending you a holiday update. I wrote in about being too anxious about my relationship. I got on some medication that has helped ease the anxiety, but settling in to my job and my new relationship have helped as well. Taking deep breaths every day, learning some coping strategies, listening to This American Life on NPR when my mind starts to spin. Although my anxiety made me want to run away from my boyfriend, I'm so happy I stayed put. He is amazing, a great fit for me, and I'm so sad to see him go back to his family for the holidays. I want him to stay with me! To the commenters that thought I was a spoiled brat whose parents had paid for me to travel -- I actually fudged the truth a bit to remain anonymous (Meredith, you can publish this now). I was actually in a very different place (not Europe) and I went there with nothing, worked while I was there, and saved money so I could spend the time afterwards traveling. That was all done independently.

Happy holidays.

And an update from someone who wanted more.

I followed your advice, and I have to admit, it did take a little while for me to do that, but I finally broke it off with him because I knew he would never marry me. He is 43. He would've been married by now if he was going to get married. (Maybe I'm just not the one, but knowing him, I don't think he is the marrying kind.) Now I'm single again. I want to meet someone but it is hard. I never go out because between working a full time job and raising my 4yo beautiful daughter, I'm busy, but that's OK. I am blessed. Someday I will meet the right guy, and if I don't, I will have fun trying. My baby will always come first.

I want to thank you very much for your advice, and I wish you a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!!

And that's that. Have a great holiday. See you tomorrow.
- Meredith

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ABOUT LOVE LETTERS: Welcome to Love Letters, the place for love advice (giving and getting). Globe relationship columnist Meredith Goldstein and Boston.com readers are ready to take your letters and tell you what's what. Have a question? Click here to submit or email us at loveletters@boston.com.
Blogger Meredith Goldstein

Meredith Goldstein is a Boston Globe columnist who follows relationship trends and entertainment. She offers daily advice on Love Letters — and welcomes your comments. Meredith is also the author of "The Singles," a novel about complicated relationships. Follow Meredith at www.meredithgoldstein.netand on Twitter. Love Letters can be found in the print edition of The Boston Globe every Saturday in the G section.

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