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Which Online Dating Site is Best for Me?

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Q:

Hi Meredith,

I divorced about a year ago. I have two young children and am diving back into the dating scene. I joined Match.com and eHarmony at the beginning of the year and have met several nice men but haven't found a a real connection yet. I feel as if I'm looking at the same group of guys on those sites all the time and either they're not interested in me or vice versa. I thought I'd look into Tinder as well to see what's out there and while there seem to be some nice men, there are also a lot of men who jump right in with inappropriate comments. ("You look yummy!") I want a decent, nice man and am not looking for a casual hook up (although I'm not adverse to casual dating and some fun while looking for the right guy).

My question is, which dating sites are the best for a woman in my situation? I work two jobs (one full time and one part time) and between work and my children, I'm a pretty busy woman. I don't have a ton of time to deal with sleazy men. I realize that you never know when or where a nice guy might pop up but I feel like I need to target my search a little better.†

Any suggestions for a cute but tired single mom looking for a cute and decent guy?

Thank you!!!

– Overwhelmed By Dating Sites

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A: The thing about online dating is that it's all about who's on these websites at any given time. I know people who've found long-term partners on all of these sites (except Tinder), but I've never been convinced that one program is better than another.

My advice is to stick to sites that allow you to choose someone based on a written profile that you can consider for a while, not just a picture that you're meant to swipe. The profiles make it less about yummy and more about compatibility. (Yummy is great for some people, but not for you.)

And make sure that you tell everyone in your life that you're looking to date. Don't let these websites stop you from searching for partners in your own community.

Also -- know that this process takes time. Diving back into the dating scene might mean having a date once a month (or less). You can't rush the process.

Readers? Any thoughts on online dating sites? How should she manage her expectations? Is there a better way for her to narrow her search? Yummy?

– Meredith