Happy Friday and welcome to another week of "After the Altar," my new summer blog series dedicated to celebrating the union of marriage and the beauty of love. Every Friday during June and July, I will highlight a married couple who will bravely share their challenges, triumphs, and secrets to wedded bliss.
We often focus on the work that goes into the wedding day -- the invitations, the cake, the dress, the guests. Let's give equal attention to the 'work' that takes place after the altar.
This week’s couple holds a special place in my heart because we share the same wedding date!
Boston.com, meet Kaidi and Chris.
Roxbury couple Kaidi and Chris first met in the seventh grade. The year was 1982. Kaidi recalls that even back then there was a lovable romance and shares a time when a chance encounter led to a sweet kiss after school. They both joke and say that kiss was the ‘seed of their love.’ The couple reconnected in 1988. From that point forward a deep and passionate courtship began. Both shared a desire for justice worldwide and participated in boycotts against corporations in support of apartheid and fought racial injustice during the Charles Stuart case in the 80s. While students at Northeastern University, Chris realized that he couldn’t live his life without Kaidi. The couple wed on October 12, 1991.
Expertly Engaged: Longevity in a marriage takes work. How do you make is work 22 years ‘after the altar’?
Kaidi & Chris: This October will make 22 years of marriage. We’ve had great pastors, mentors, and elders who we owe so much. They encourage us to communicate, be considerate of one another, and make a lot of love! One principle that we practice in our relationship is to ALWAYS put our marriage first and parenting as a close second. We don’t allow the children to disintegrate our relationship (and those who have children can certainly relate to this one)! Specific things that help us keep the fire burning hot include listening to our favorite love songs from the 70s and 80s, working out and keeping our bodies fit, virtual flirting (yes…sexting), and allowing each other space to breathe and then coming back together again.
Expertly Engaged: Do you believe in date nights? Do you have other rituals or special activities that you reserve for one another?
Kaidi & Chris: Date night, smate night! We believe in sporadic getaways more than your standard date nights. We love to find low-key places to walk and share intellect. We love to worship and meditate in nature. We sing songs to each other and share our dreams and goals with each other.
Expertly Engaged: Any advice for all the newlyweds and soon-to-be newlyweds out there?
Kaidi & Chris: Our advice would be to make sure the foundation of your relationship is built on solid ground and not sand. The storms of life will tear down marriages built on fantasy. Our marriage is built on the teachings of Christ. This ancient wisdom has stood the test of 2,000+ years and has yielded us the most exciting and visceral experiences ever. At the end of the day it’s all about reconciliation and putting the other’s needs before your own. Enjoy your friendship and be explorative!
Want more of Kaidi and Chris? Check out their new vlog series, For Lovers Only, launching next month on YouTube and Facebook!
Do you know a married couple whose relationship is all that and a bag of chips? Is your marriage blog-worthy and feature ready for After the Altar? Email me. I'd love to hear your story.
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