Battle of Shaker Heights
''I never feel more alive than when I'm facing simulated danger,'' says Kelly Ernswiler (Shia LaBeouf), the Ohio teenager whose growing pains are at the center of ''The Battle of Shaker Heights.'' He's being sardonic -- he knows no other way -- but he could be speaking for the movie as a whole. The perils of being an intelligent adolescent have been told many, many times before, but rarely have they felt quite so simulated as they do here.
That said, ''Battle'' is short enough (at 78 minutes, it's practically an after-school special) and amiable enough to go down easy, and it's graced with a wry, tough lead performance that engages your sympathy. I've never quite been able to figure out LaBeouf's appeal before this -- he's cute on the Disney Channel's ''Even Stevens,'' and he made a pleasant Stanley Yelnats in ''Holes'' -- but I'm a convert now.
Kelly's a poor kid in a tony neighborhood, and he's one of those scarily smart, physically unprepossessing teenagers who fall through the cracks of high school. His chosen hobby is World War II trivia and memorabilia, primarily because that's the best way to annoy his parents, hippie art teacher Eve (Kathleen Quinlan) and wobbly recovered junkie Abe (William Sadler).
At a reenactment of the Battle of the Bulge (staged in 72-degree weather), Kelly befriends Bart Bowland (Elden Hansen), a chunky, dissatisfied son of wealth. The two friends bond over Bart's dad's collection of war relics -- although the old man (Ray Wise of ''Twin Peaks'') is into collecting nesting dolls now -- and when Kelly meets Bart's older sister Tabby (Amy Smart), it's as though he'd been vouchsafed a glimpse of the Shiksa on the Half Shell. He's smitten.
Tabby's an artist, too, and engaged to a prep god named Miner (Anson Mount); she tolerates her brother's scruffy dork friend because he's amusing and because his attentions flatter her. The situation is clearly primed for disaster.
You'll notice the two words I haven't yet mentioned are ''Project Greenlight.'' That HBO reality series follows the production of a script chosen by executive producers Matt Damon and Ben Affleck (among others), and this season's train wreck -- all film sets being train wrecks -- has been ''The Battle of Shaker Heights.'' I haven't seen the show. I hear I've missed some good dirt. The movie deserves to be reviewed on its own.
And on its own, it's a very minor ''Catcher in the Rye,'' featuring clever but overcooked dialogue, two-dimensional supporting roles, and a disarming generosity toward its characters. While Bart's parents are little more than cartoon Richie Riches, there are no villains in Erica Beeney's script: Even Kelly's thuggish high school tormenter (Billy Kay) engenders empathy at a crucial turn.
And LaBeouf is remarkable. He's a shrimp with unfortunate hair, but he gets you to feel Kelly's despairing impatience with this poky suburban universe. You believe he'd yearn for Tabby over his sweet supermarket co-worker (Shiri Appleby). You even buy his drunk scene, in which he heartbreakingly describes how he one day decided to say whatever popped into his head and now can't stop.
In a better movie -- a much better movie -- LaBeouf might make the same sort of impact Dustin Hoffman did in ''The Graduate.'' But the kid's young. There are movies to come.
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