Money talks

Trump says those words every week on the NBC show "The Apprentice," where he does the corporate equivalent of voting tycoon wannabes off of his high-rise island. He has applied for a registered trademark so that he might sell clothing, games, and casino services emblazoned with the phrase.

Other marketers want to do the same, primarily because of the success of Trump's TV show, and the US Patent and Trademark Office has 18 applications pending for use of the words that nobody wants to hear in real life, but that have achieved the status of "Is that your final answer?" and "Bada bing, bada boom" in TV nation.

That last one is trademarked by a fireworks company in Ohio, by the way, and there are 10 trademark applications pending for the big question from the show "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?" -- which could very well be a trivia question by the time the government gives the entrepreneurs its final answer. It can take a year or two, and sometimes longer, for an application to be processed.

One trademark registration does not necessarily preclude registration of the same name by somebody else as long as the products are different enough so that consumers will not be confused. That's why Susan Brenner, owner of the "You're Fired" ceramics studio and pottery store in Glenview, Ill., does not expect trouble from Trump.

Brenner doesn't have a registered trademark, but does have what her lawyer, Marvin Benn, described as "common law trademark" because she has been in business in the Chicago area for seven years -- well before Trump became a TV star.

Still, Benn said in a phone interview that some customers have accused Brenner of stealing Trump's not-yet-trademarked phrase. Benn is working out an agreement with Trump's counsel, stipulating that the real estate baron not sell products with "You're Fired" on them in Brenner's geographic area (although "You're Fired: The Donald," and "You're Fired: Donald J. Trump" would be acceptable).

Good to know the barristers take such matters seriously and are working to eliminate confusion. It would be nice if the whole business rested on common sense and that language could not be owned by anyone. But advertising slogans fill the lexicon and the culture enjoys speaking in trademarks: "Where's the beef?" "Got milk?" "Can you hear me now?" "Just do it." "Let's roll."

In a society where just about everything is a potential logo -- or already registered -- common sense often gives way to fine print, and free speech can get expensive.