Free the cable box

'THESE CABLE bills are outrageous," our friend said, ''and the stuff that is on some of them! I've got two teenage girls, and I wouldn't want them to watch a lot of it."

Comcast, the nation's largest cable television company, just unveiled a new 16-channel Family Tier that might satisfy our friend's needs. So we showed him the channel lineup.

''The Weather Channel is good, and so is CNN Headline news, and I like it that they've cut out MTV. But a lot of it is geared for little kids. Who needs Toon Disney? And I like to watch the Red Sox, but that's NESN, and how about the other news channels? Can't I get them added on?"

We called Shawn Feddeman, Comcast regional spokeswoman, to find out. She confirmed that the package offered was take it or leave it, like all the other cable packages.

Comcast and the other cable companies argue that allowing subscribers to pick and choose would be too expensive and force little-watched channels off the air. Maybe they are right, but without trying the a la carte option, no one will ever know for sure.

Congress deregulated the industry in 1996. The only hope for relief comes from the Federal Communications Commission, which cannot determine what the industry must carry, but does exercise leverage when cable companies decide to buy each other out. Comcast wants to acquire part of Adelphia Communications, and the FCC chairman, Kevin Martin, has hinted he might delay approval until the company gives customers the option of avoiding inappropriate programming.

''Looks like Comcast has put out something just to keep him off their backs," our friend said. ''That Family Tier is designed to fail."

Feddeman noted that even with the present package, our friend can use the remote control to program the cable box so it could block undesirable channels. ''I can barely get the remote to turn the box and the TV on at the same time," he replied in a huff.

Cable television is the kind of semimonopoly that cries out for government regulation -- maybe not the price controls that were lifted in 1996, but some consumer protection.

It's probably too much to expect the FCC to insist on a la carte immediately. But the commission should make it a condition of the Adelphia deal that Comcast -- and Time Warner, which is also buying part of the company -- report back in a few months with the numbers of subscribers who sign up for the Family Tier. If it is not popular, the next step is to insist on an a la carte experiment.

As for our friend, he should put down the remote and write his senators and US representatives, urging them to mandate that option. In a competitive marketplace, consumers should be able to order what they want to watch, and only that.