Memorializing that day

By Todd D. Jick, 9/11/2003

WHAT DO WE DO with Sept. 11 -- this year and in years to come? The trauma that gripped this country and the world seems to have dissipated, and with the economy slowly coming back and more ordinary daily struggles taking our attention, there seems to be a natural tendency toward moving on. After all we've been through, isn't it a good sign that we've found a way to cope with our grief and are now ready to lift our heads? Or is it too soon to put it behind us? Should we work harder to keep it in the forefront? I have been living and working with these questions over the past year, having been selected by the Lower Manhattan Development Corporation -- whose mandate is the rebuilding and renewal of the 16 acres of the World Trade Center site -- to serve as the facilitator of numerous groups charged to help determine the nature and design of the World Trade Center Memorial at Ground Zero.

It required traveling back and forth from Boston to New York to work with families, residents, architects, firefighters and police, political representatives, and many others. It involved working closely with Memorial Mission and Program committees struggling with the question of how to create a memorial that will take all of us through an arc of emotions ranging from the darkest moments of gloom and loss to heroic and life-affirming actions that symbolize hope for the future. Now I am assisting the jury that is selecting from among 5,200 submissions for the memorial itself.

For all these dedicated people -- many of whom were directly affected by 9/11 -- there is a kind of obsession with everything associated with that day. It is not only in the forefront of their lives every day, it seems to have overtaken every nerve ending of their being. The intensity of emotion persists around 9/11: victims' family members pouring out their hearts and dreams for the content of the 4.5 acres set aside for a memorial, united firefighters pleading for their lost comrades to be named and listed together in a fitting tribute, residents seeking some restoration of normalcy in their day-to-day lives while still respecting the marking of lives lost, architects and artists designing works to express aspects of grief and rebirth through their craft. It is a world filled with emotions and passions of well-meaning people who are still struggling almost every day, it appears, to cope with 9/11.

Once you are alongside them and enter their world, their struggle never leaves you. Yet it appears very disconnected from most of the nation. Attention spans seem fleeting, and we are onto today's news headlines and concerns. We all know how easy it is to be caught up in Memorial Day "sales" and not tears. When I describe the obsession with 9/11 that still exists for many in Lower Manhattan, many are sympathetic but wonder when they will move on with their lives.

So 9/11 will pass for many of us quickly and without fanfare. Even our schools may be colluding. Last spring, teachers at a prominent local high school met to anticipate the plans for the September opening of school. As part of the discussion, they considered what to do on Sept. 11. The majority argued it should be low key -- perhaps a moment of silence -- but others said it should be "business as usual." Indeed their plans for this year are to have a brief assembly and then resume their regular schedule.

The pace and nature of how each of us grieves and copes varies. Some have moved on, some not. Some are obsessed, some are oblivious.

But how will we collectively mark this day? A moment of silence? A regular work day? A day of reflection and dialogue? A day of service?

What is unsettling is that our collective response has become diffuse. We must ensure that we do something more transcendent for today and for tomorrow's generations to create lasting touch points to memorialize and learn from what happened.

No one who saw the walls of pictures and remembrances of the victims that pervaded New York can forget that this was a communal experience. No one who has encountered the emotions of those helping to create the Ground Zero memorial can escape this responsibility.

Indeed, they will help all of us to create a physical memorial, but what will we do to create ways to memorialize everything surrounding that day -- year in and year out -- for today's generation and those to come? If we are not careful, a moment of silence will turn into total silence.

Todd D. Jick is managing partner at the Center for Executive Development, specializing in custom executive education and leadership consulting.