Setting back women's rightsPage 2 of 2 -- As for the Patriarch of the Year Award, we can't overlook the British geniuses at Brighter Pictures who are pitching a reality program tentatively named "Make Me a Mum." If it gets aired, we will be watching 1,000 men compete for fatherhood in a series culminating in an on-air "sperm race." We give these men a tip straight from Dr. Ruth: Speed isn't everything.
The Musical Misogyny Baton, a downbeat award, goes to the rappers who have made the pimp into a hip status symbol. One baton for rapper Nelly, who owns and markets Pimp Juice. One for the animators who created "Lil Pimp." One for rapper 50 Cent, who made $18 million on his song "P.I.M.P." And one for the video in which a rapper is seen "walking" two women on leashes. Alas, this brings us to the Dubious Equality Award. It belongs now to Lynndie England, the soldier seen around the world holding an Iraqi prisoner on a leash. Need we say more?Let's not forget the Blind Justice Award. The winner this year is Judge Gene Stephenson. In a Florida rape trial, he offered : "Why would he want to rape her? She doesn't look like a day at the beach." We give the judge many, many days on the beach. The Backlash Award goes to Family Circle, which has sponsored yet another cookie bakeoff between Laura Bush and Teresa Heinz Kerry. May we suggest that the editors take their magazine on a much needed low-carb diet? Onward soldiers now to the Battle of the Sexes. The 2004 ribbon goes to the Vatican, which wants to make peace through passivity. In a long document, the hierarchy recommends women cultivate "feminine values" such as "listening, welcoming, humility, faithfulness, praise and waiting." Waiting? Listening? This year, those rabid Catholic feminists in several dioceses were even banned from foot-washing ceremonies. We send the Vatican hearing aids. Finally, the Missing Woman Award goes to the Bush administration. Log on to government Web sites and you will discover that the old fact sheets about, say, the earning differences between men and women have been removed. In their place are new upbeat offerings such as "Hot Jobs for the 21st century." Who would have dreamed that the Bush minions would work so hard to make women's issues, uh, disappear?
Ellen Goodman's e-mail address is ellengoodman@globe.com. © Copyright 2004 Globe Newspaper Company.
|
