I still haven't found what I'm looking for

It is abhorrent, of course, to make fun of someone's religion. Unless that religion happens to be your own.

In the 13 years since I wrote those words, I have displayed admirable restraint in commenting about the faith into which I was baptized, the Episcopal Church of America, a.k.a. "God's Frozen People." Until now.

A few months ago I could not believe my eyes when I read in the Globe that a 115-year-old congregation, All Saints Episcopal in Attleboro , had "changed its name to All Saints Anglican Church and affiliated itself with the Anglican Province of Rwanda." Ah, yes. Rwanda and Attleboro: an elusive but subtle connection.

Attleboro turned out to be just one of dozens of Episcopal churches that had sworn fealty to African bishops because the Americans objected to the ordination of gay clergy, and especially to the elevation of an openly gay man, Gene Robinson, to be the bishop of New Hampshire. The schismatics invoke endless biblical argle-bargle to defend their un-Christian bigotry, but in the end it boils down to this: They are unwilling to love and accept their neighbors as themselves.

There is nothing inherently evil about African prelates like Emmanuel Kolini , the archbishop of Rwanda, or another conservative pinup, archbishop Peter Akinola of Nigeria. In fact, there is plenty of good. Both men have acted bravely in the Wild West maelstrom of African tribal politics. But the Americans embrace these bishops for only one reason: They regard homosexuality as a sin. Kolini affirmed this in a 2004 interview with the Atlanta Journal-Constitution: "To be Christian, there are some fundamentals, some basics to our faith. The question is 'is homosexuality a sin or not?' If the Scripture calls it a sin, then it's a sin."

The interviewer noted that scripture had been used to justify slavery, at which point Kolini explained that he doesn't hate homosexuals, whom he numbers among his friends; he just disagrees with them. For his part, according to Time magazine, Akinola "has called Robinson's elevation 'a satanic attack on the church of God.' "

I'm not judging the Africans. I'm judging the Americans. It's time to come home and resolve your differences here. Before the Episcopal church becomes a laughing stock.

Oops! Too late! Only recently have I tuned in to the latest Episcopalian fad, the "U2charist." If humorist Dave Barry were still writing columns, he would add: I am not making this up.

Since 2005, when the Rev. Paige Blair of York, Maine, first blared such U2 hits as "Where the Streets Have No Name," "One," and "Yahweh " over her church's loudspeakers, 200 Episcopal churches have hosted U2charists, which combine traditional elements of the service, like Bible readings, with the spiritual bleatings of the Irish rock band. (E.g.: "I was on the inside/ When they pulled the four walls down/ I was looking through the window/ I was lost, I am found.")

Can you imagine -- the U2charists often outdraw the traditional Sunday services! You can hear numerous interviews with Blair and clips from U2charists at her church's website, stgeorgesyorkharbor.org.

"Folks who are critical [of U2charists] usually haven't attended one," Blair told the Globe's Erica Noonan last month. "But it's not about an encounter with Bono. It's about an encounter with Jesus." Right. If the Episcopalians want to plant fannies in the pews, why don't they take a tip from Oprah and just give out cars? That's a proven audience pleaser.

Yes, of course I am being unfair. The U2charist is just another proto-religious exercise, like the now-ubiquitous labyrinth that shows up in denominations everywhere. What's my beef? It's just so obvious that people would rather listen to rock music than try to puzzle through the maze of St. Paul's teachings. It is hard work to get out of the house on Sunday morning (or on Friday evening, or Saturday evening; I'm nothing if not ecumenical), to resist the blandishments of Walter Scott's Personality Parade, and to show up in church.

It is also hard work to worship alongside people who may not share your precise beliefs, or your sexual orientation. It's so much easier to start your own church, or to pretend that someone in Africa has the answer to your problems, or to worship a rock star with tinted glasses.

Yes, religion is hard work. That's why so few people bother with it. Rock on.

I love my readers, but not all my readers love me. My colleagues Ann Silvio and Joseph Kahn help me read my hate mail in a new podcast , available at boston.com/podcasts, or on iTunes.

Alex Beam is a Globe columnist. His e-dress is beam@globe.com.