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Robin Abrahams writes the weekly "Miss Conduct" column for The Boston Globe Magazine. More...

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Robin Abrahams also gives talks on a range of topics relating to social behavior, including etiquette, diversity, social anxiety, religion, and storytelling. Bring Miss Conduct's humor and common sense to your next meeting. For details, e-mail missconduct@globe.com.

Advice from ConductMom

By Robin Abrahams
09:08 PM

A reader sends in this idea for the holiday season:

What about this for the holidays? I have a friend that always gave me gifts that were either "silly" or not appropriate to my lifestyle (for any holiday, not just Christmas). Before Christmas many years ago, I suggested that a friend of mine and I exchange Christmas (costume) jewelry and she liked the idea, so that tradition began for us and worked beautifully. One could use this mode of gift exchange with plates (I myself collect them) or a particular brand of cosmetics or hand cleanser, etc. This idea can be time-saving, mind-saving, and will guarantee that the recipient will be pleased with their gift. AND you can spend as little or as much as you both can afford.

The reader is my mother, and she sent the e-mail in to the "Miss Conduct" e-mail address, not my personal one. I mentioned this to my editor Susanne (plucked me from obscurity, Malcolm McLaren to my Sid Vicious, etc.), who commented, "She uses the formal channels instead of her inside connection? Your mother is so restrained!"

Both Susanne and my mother know I respect them, and thus I trust they will not be offended if I say this in response:

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA.

Seriously, Mom, good advice. Y'all lissen up to my ma, now, you hear?