Lothrop Withington III, 65; handled legal system with the ease of a sailor

Lothrop Withington III, a lawyer, was as happy at the helm of a sturdy boat maneuvering choppy waters as he was comfortable maneuvering a legal case in front of a judge.

"He always said law was his job, but it was not his life. He was always happiest when he was out to sea," Robert Betters said yesterday of his 65-year-old law partner, who died of cancer Tuesday at home in Plymouth.

When he was out of the office, Mr. Withington loved nothing more than slipping on rain gear and sailing the Atlantic in his 23-foot sailboat, the Aleator. He regularly chartered boats in the Virgin Islands and competed in the Marion to Bermuda Cruising Yacht Race.

Mr. Withington was the son of Lothrop Withington Jr. of Plymouth, who was said to have started the goldfish-swallowing craze at Harvard College in 1939, and Lois Brewster Roberts of Harwich, who descended from a Mayflower passenger.

"He came from a very large family, and he was related to half the people in the Plymouth," said Betters. Most knew him by the nickname Cricket. "He always said you'd want a nickname too, if you had a name like Lothrop," said Betters.

His brother, Ellis Brewster Withington of Plymouth, said the moniker traces back to a story about family pets.

"I'd like to say he got the nickname because when he was born, he rolled over and rubbed his legs together, but it was really because his father kept crickets as pets when he was a child, and Lothrop became his 'little cricket,' " his brother said.

Mr. Withington was born in Decatur, Ala. He attended the University of Colorado before serving in the Army during the Vietnam War. He attained the rank of captain and was awarded a Bronze Star.

After his military service, he graduated from the University of Massachusetts and Boston College Law School.

He specialized in business and family law and "did a lot of free legal work for family and friends," said his brother.

Mr. Withington's easy manner could be deceiving. "He was very calm and affable, but you wouldn't want to cross him," said Betters. "He could be stubborn and tenacious."

"His clients always came first," said his wife, Marianne (Cavicchi).

But he was also devoted to his family. "He was the eldest of 38 grandchildren, and he made sure the whole family kept in touch," said his sister, Lydia Withington Holmes of Stow.

Mr. Withington was a director of the Henry Hornblower Fund, a philanthropic foundation; former president of the Eel River Beach Club; and vice president of the Pilgrim Society. When he was not out on the waves, he enjoyed skeet shooting and bird hunting.

"He had the greatest sense of humor and was very clever," said his sister. "He was very smart. If you were on [the TV show] 'Who Wants to be a Millionaire,' you'd want him to be your backup."

In addition to his parents, wife, and siblings, Mr. Withington leaves a daughter, Ashley Withington McInerney of Plymouth; a son, Lothrop IV of Osterville; and another sister, Ellen of Fort Myers Beach, Fla.

A memorial service will be held today at 10 a.m. in First Parish Church in Plymouth.