Sept. 11, 2004 -- tears and tributes

At ground zero in New York City and at Boston memorials, the names of the dead were spoken aloud again yesterday. Leaders in Washington paused for a moment of silence, and bells tolled over a Pennsylvania field as the nation engaged in somber rituals, now familiar, to mark the third anniversary of Sept. 11, 2001.

On a day devoted to memories of children, parents, siblings, and spouses killed when terrorists flew planes into the World Trade Center and the Pentagon, speakers also paid tribute to the strength of the survivors. During a ceremony at the State House, Lieutenant Colonel Jim Ogonowski, whose brother, John, was the captain of hijacked American Airlines Flight 11, asked families to remember not only the tragedy, but the tremendous outpouring of volunteerism and patriotism that followed.

"That's the part of Sept. 11 the terrorists don't want us to remember," Ogonowski said.

At the State House in Boston and at the trade center site in New York, some family members said yesterday was the first time they felt ready to take part in public ceremonies -- a sign of healing that made the day no less difficult. Debbie Hayes of Amesbury, whose husband, Robert, died on Flight 11, brought her two young sons to the State House, where Governor Mitt Romney spoke of his "unfathomable appreciation" for the victims' sacrifices.

Last year, Hayes traveled to Canada to avoid the flood of remembrances. "This year I thought I was ready to do it," she said. "But it's hard."

Families also gathered at a private ceremony at the Boston Opera House, where the names of the 200 victims with ties to Massachusetts were read. Most were killed on the two Los Angeles-bound flights from Boston that were flown into the World Trade towers by hijackers, Flight 11 and United Airlines Flight 175.

Later yesterday, at the Sept. 11 memorial in the Public Garden, some families knelt to make rubbings of their loved ones' names carved in the stone.

In New York, four moments of silence were observed at the site of the World Trade Center, to mark the instants when the two planes from Boston hit the towers, just before and after 9 a.m., and later, when each of the towers collapsed.

Parents and grandparents of those killed read the names of the 2,749 victims who died there, a tribute that lasted three hours, while others in the crowd cried quietly and embraced. When they reached the names of their own loved ones, readers added brief personal notes in voices strained with emotion -- "our loving son"; "my wife."

"Every day is hard, but this day is a little bit harder," said Nancy Brandemarti, who attended the ground zero remembrance for the first time.

At sundown, light beams evoking the twin towers were projected upward from a lot nearby, and remained lit through the night. A cornerstone was laid at the site this summer for a 1,776-foot skyscraper, the Freedom Tower, that will be built there by 2009.

In Washington, President Bush observed a moment of silence on the South Lawn of the White House, while at Arlington National Cemetery, Defense Secretary Donald H. Rumsfeld joined relatives of the 184 people killed at the Pentagon when it was hit by another hijacked flight from Washington's Dulles Airport. Rumsfeld laid a wreath of white flowers near a granite monument that bears the victims' names, as a distant bugler played taps.

"We remember the images of fire, and the final calls of love, and the courage of rescuers who saw death and did not flee," the president said in a statement yesterday. "We remember the many good lives that ended too soon."

Senator John F. Kerry attended the gathering at the Opera House, where he told them that while Sept. 11 was "the worst day we have ever seen, it brought out the best in all of us."

"I know you've had times when you wondered how you were going to make it through . . . But hour after hour, you held on," he said. "In the past three years, with countless acts of bravery and kindness, you've continued to give meaning to those lives."

Family members rose to their feet under the theater's ornate ceiling, and remained standing, as the names of the region's victims were read. Several survivors shared tributes to their loved ones, including Sonia Puopolo of Miami, whose mother, a Dover resident also named Sonia, died on Flight 11.

The young woman called her mother "my soulmate, my best friend, my guardian angel," and raised her left hand to display her mother's diamond wedding ring. She said the ring was recovered from the rubble at ground zero months after the attacks and returned undamaged to her family.

"This ring is her message to me, and to all of us," Puopolo said. "It's a message of perseverance, love, and abiding faith."

Franklin Ross, a college student whose father, Richard, died on Flight 11, described the "reawakening of pain" he feels with every 9/11 headline, but ended by sharing his father's "legacy of optimism."

"He would have said, 'Love life, live it, enjoy every moment, and don't spend time on things you cannot change,' " Ross said of his father, a Newton resident.

Two women who lost their husbands in the attack, Susan Retik and Patti Quigley, finished a 250-mile bike ride from ground zero yesterday at Boston Common, where they pumped their fists in celebration as they pedaled through a crowd of well-wishers.

Retik, from Needham, and Quigley, from Wellesley, were expectant mothers whose communities rallied around them when their husbands, David Retik and Patrick Quigley, were killed on the flights from Boston. In March, they decided to give something back by raising $100,000 for widows in Afghanistan, many of whom are unable to provide for their families, by establishing the Beyond the 11th foundation and organizing the three-day charity ride.

More than 200 bikers joined them for the final 30 miles, and a few local cyclists met them at the Rhode Island border. "They gave us our 11th wind," Retik said.

A commemorative blood drive at Fenway Park yesterday was expected to bring some 750 donations from Red Sox fans and others who began lining up before the gates opened. Last year, the blood drive's first, 450 donors showed up.

"There's a natural desire for people to want to come together and do something positive and constructive today," said Charles Steinberg, a Red Sox official who suggested the drive be held on Sept. 11.

In western Pennsylvania, where United Airlines Flight 93, out of Newark, N.J., went down in a field on Sept. 11, volunteers rang two large bells as the names of each of the plane's 40 passengers and crew members were read.

"No words, no memorials, can ever replace all that you have lost," Homeland Security Secretary Tom Ridge told families there.

Material from the Associated Press was used in this report.