Cardinal recalls emotional meeting with pope

Cardinal Sean P. O'Malley became emotional yesterday as he recounted to reporters the dramatic and unprecedented meeting earlier this week between Pope Benedict XVI and five people from Boston who had been sexually abused by priests.

Asked how difficult the meeting was for him personally, O'Malley paused for a long moment and appeared to tear up.

"Just seeing the book makes a great impact," he said, referring to a handmade document he gave the pontiff listing the names of nearly 1,500 alleged victims of clergy sexual abuse in the Archdiocese of Boston. As the pope slowly turned the pages, the cardinal mentioned that some of the victims died from suicide or drug abuse.

"I know the Holy Father was touched by it as well," he said at a news conference at Boston College's Silvio O. Conte Forum where the Boston Catholic Men's Conference was held yesterday.

O'Malley, who has met with hundreds of Boston-area abuse victims, quietly brokered the historic meeting, writing three times to the Vatican to request the audience in the months after Benedict decided not to visit Boston during this week's trip to the United States.

"I was anxious to dispel the idea that the Holy Father was avoiding coming to Boston because of the sex abuse crisis," O'Malley said.

"I also wanted him to appreciate that this is such a serious issue and we needed to hear from him about this," he said.

While a defining moment of Benedict's trip to the United States, it remains to be seen whether the meeting marks a turning point in the church's posture toward the abuse crisis. Asked what lies ahead for the Boston Archdiocese, O'Malley said he hopes that people who are concerned about the safety of children will "see us as allies."

"The sexual abuse problem is not something that's just a Catholic problem or a church problem, it's a human problem," O'Malley said. "Certainly the fact that the church dealt with it so poorly in the past was the scandal. But I'd like to think that our Catholic people now are sensitized and working very hard to try and bring about reconciliation and to make our church just the safest place possible."

The clergy sex abuse scandal has been a near-constant theme during Benedict's six-day visit to the United States. Before his plane had even touched down on American soil, the pontiff set a contrite tone, telling reporters aboard his plane that the Catholic Church is "deeply ashamed" by the abuse crisis that has roiled American Catholicism.

Thursday, the pope, 81, met for a half-hour with representatives from the Boston Archdiocese and the victims at the Apostolic Nunciature, the residence of the pope's ambassador to the United States, on Embassy Row.

"I was very, very moved by the whole experience," O'Malley said. "The Holy Father spoke about the pain he felt and the shame. He said that for so long he's been praying by those who have been damaged, touched, and hurt by the whole experience. . . . It was a very moving and a very reassuring experience. The Holy Father feels very deeply what these survivors have gone through."

O'Malley also addressed the excitement that many Catholics feel about the pontiff's last day in America. More than 3,000 Boston-area Catholics are expected to attend the papal Mass at Yankee Stadium today, and O'Malley, who planned to return to New York to attend the service himself, promised them an extension of the "enthusiasm and joy that has been so much a part of this trip."

The cardinal joked that he would wear his red socks and might emulate the Red Sox-supporting construction worker who recently revealed he had buried a Sox jersey under the new Yankee Stadium.

"If I get a chance, I may bury them somewhere in the outfield," he said.

Tania deLuzuriaga can be reached at deluzuriaga@globe.com.