Knock it off, and accept
John, take a deep breath. Relax for a minute. Don't worry, everyone else is going to breathe and relax at the same time, so you're not at any disadvantage. We need to have another talk.
You were doing so well for so long. Well, OK, you were doing well for a little while, then you were mediocre. But mediocre might be all it takes against this guy.
This idea of not accepting the nomination at the Democratic National Convention in Boston -- genius, pure genius. I honestly don't know of anyone else who would have thought of that. You and George Bush should be given the exact same amount of money on the exact same day. When you think long and hard about it, it's only fair and right.
Now knock it off. Nobody's going to think that long and hard about it. The only thing they're going to be thinking about is this politician who's always trying to play every side of every issue, always looking for a way out. He'd be the kind of lawyer always trying to get his clients off on a technicality -- that's what they'll be saying.
Can you hear all the network anchors now? They'll be asking: When's a nominating convention not a nominating convention? Answer: When it's John Kerry's. Bostonians will be asking, if this isn't really a nominating convention, does that mean those roads aren't really closed? Does that mean I can get to my job?
Probably not, but that's beside the point. You've somehow managed to tick off half the free world -- the Democratic half. Look at Tom Menino. He heard about your plan by reading a wire service story at 3 o'clock Friday afternoon. Have a good weekend, mayor. He was running around town for the next two days grousing that he feels like a glorified "janitor."
Actually, I think he meant concierge. He's got politicos across America calling him for restaurant recommendations and hotel reservations, but neither of his home state senators bothered telling him that the nominating convention that he fought so hard to land may not actually include a nomination.
But let's look at the substance. You're afraid that you're going to be defenseless in August while Bush pummels you with ads funded by millions of dollars in private contributions. Think about that. It's August. People are on vacation. They're at the lake or the beach. They're not thinking about politics and the ads you may or may not be able to afford.
Besides, you're going to get a blitz of positive news in the inevitably warm afterglow of the convention. After that, the Olympics are on from Aug. 13 to 29. The GOP convention starts the next day. Then it's September, and everyone's even.
Let's think big, because that's how you're going to win this race. You're running against an incumbent president who has already spent $130 million, the vast bulk of that on television ads, and you're still even or ahead in the polls. Gas costs well over $2 a gallon. Iraq is more of a deadly mess with every passing day. The economy is stagnant. The world despises us. And Bush's force-fed, good-ol'-boy twang makes even those who like him, myself included, want to wring his neck.
So here's what to do. Call a press conference. Announce that yours is a campaign founded on ideas, not fat cat contributions, and that while some of your advisers have counseled you to level the playing field by stalling the nomination, you don't see any need to do it.
No, you're going to proudly accept the Democratic nomination for president of the United States in the city you love best, and then you're going to take your case directly to the people of this vast and great land. Let George Bush have his spending advantage. That's fine. You're not naive; you understand money is important. But in the end you truly believe that the presidency is more about the power of ideas and the character of the person proposing them than a few extra attack ads in the dog days of summer.
Lastly, I'd say be yourself, but I'm not sure that's the best advice. So be the guy that people believe you can become. Just make it quick, because time matters more than money right now.
Brian McGrory is a Globe columnist. He can be reached at mcgrory@globe.com.
