Decision leaves no one unscathed

(Correction: Because of incorrect information provided by a translator, David Bunfad was mistakenly identified as David Zohar and his daughter, Shimrit Zohar Bunfad, as Shimrit Zohar in a collection of quotations from the Gaza Strip in the Aug. 7 World pages.)

The planned evacuation of Jewish settlements from the Gaza Strip this month has raised conflicting emotions in Israel. The tension affects Israelis from every sector of society, from settlers who are losing their homes to soldiers under orders to remove them. Four people caught up in the dramatic change reflect on their lives and the challenges ahead.

David Zohar, 55
Manages the Neve Dekalim post office and runs Shimrit's House, a synagogue and community center

This synagogue is in memory of my daughter, Shimrit Zohar. She died 3 years ago. She was 16. Two weeks before she passed away, she was driving on the Kissufim road, and shots were fired at her car. She became very anxious. She couldn't speak. . . . A week later, we took her to the hospital, and the next week she died. The doctors can't explain it. . . .

I worked to renovate the whole cemetery in her honor. Then I built this place with my own hands, the electricity, the painting. I built the tables. Sometimes I didn't have enough money. Each time, I spoke to God, and Shimrit helped me. . . .

[The building is scheduled to be torn down and the cemetery moved.] It's difficult to talk about. . . . Most of my family don't want to make any preparations because they don't believe we will be expelled. But I need to be ready for the worst. If it happens, we will rebuild Shimrit's House in Nitsan [where many settlers are being relocated].

We have more problems with Shimrit's grave. It's not a table that I can move first to Tel Aviv and then to Haifa and then who knows where. . . . If I take the grave to another place and we end up staying here, I won't be able to bring her back. If I leave her here and then a month later the Palestinians come and start a war here, the prime minister will say, ''I'm not going to risk my soldiers to protect a few graves. . . ."

I'm praying every day to God to cancel the disengagement. I'm asking my daughter to stand next to God and ask him. They are ruining our lives. . . . I'm ashamed. I feel insulted. There's a checkpoint, and another, and another, like I'm a wanted man. . . . When the soldiers come, I don't want to be at home. I don't want to see an 18-year-old boy or girl come and tell me to get out of the house.

Albert Amar, 50
Police officer, Neve Dekalim

Everyone is affected in his own way; everyone decides how he will react. Personally, I'm a policeman, a man of the law. We need to leave.

I've lived here 25 years. We were one of the first families here. We came from Beersheba. . . . This place was one big sand dune. I built a house, raised my five children. They all still live here in Gush Katif (Gaza's largest settlement bloc, which includes Neve Dekalim). My son is training to be an officer in the army. It's hardest on him, because he studied in a yeshiva.

We are on our way back to Beersheba. I rented a villa there. I'm not participating in the disengagement. I took a special vacation from the police. I've been working in the Katif police for 24 years. The commander of the area has been easy on us and promises us jobs in our new hometowns. He says: ''Where do you guys want to work? We're going to open the door for you. . . ."

Living here was fine, up until the last few years. Lately, Qassams and mortar shells have been falling. People from outside the family are afraid to come visit. Special events, like weddings and bar mitzvahs, we no longer have here.

I'm not just disengaging from my house. Also from my friends, my society, my synagogue. I'm losing things from all directions. . . .

We respect the laws of a democratic country. It hurts me because I'm for the system, for the police.

Fanny Arama
Nurse at Neve Dekalim's health clinic

I don't have any plans. I haven't done anything [to get ready to move]. I asked myself if I'm making a mistake. But when I saw that Israel is headed for a big disaster, I decided that I won't do anything. This is our promised land. . . . I need to do the will of God.

I've lived here for 20 years. I came from Eilat. I was looking for a place to educate my children, because Eilat is a free-living city and I was afraid my daughters would grow up and go naked on the beach. When I came here it was difficult at first. I wasn't religious then. I grew up in a religious home, but at a certain stage in my life I had doubts. . . . Then I studied and I found my truth, my way of life, the Jewish way. . . .

I think [Prime Minister Ariel] Sharon should be here with us, instead of leading the disengagement. He's the one who climbed the hills; he's the one who built the houses; he's the one who went to the Temple Mount. . . . This is why we elected him. Now he's the one who's taking us out.

There is a lot of suffering at the clinic. It's already been 10 years of shelling [by Palestinian militants]. Many patients are getting tranquilizers. We are human beings; given all the pressure on us, we should have collapsed by now, but we are stronger than nature. . . .

My patients are usually confused. They're very scared. . . . But my daughter told me, ''When was the last time I had the chance to believe in God with all my heart and all my essence?" For Moses and the Jews it was the same. The Egyptians were behind them and the sea was in front of them. They didn't know what to do. God told Moses: ''Don't pray to me, act. It's a time for action." So his followers stepped into the sea, and the sea parted. . . .

So we will step into the sea. . . . If the disengagement does take place, we understand that this is the will of God.

Capt. Ella Maoz, 24
Platoon commander, Israeli Defense Forces, Tel Aviv

I command a platoon of 35 soldiers. There will be six circles of security around the houses. We are in the first circle. We are the ones evacuating the houses.

The first thing is to be mentally prepared. . . . It's a really serious and dangerous situation in a Jewish country. We have to do it with wisdom, with sensitivity, and with determination.

It's not an easy thing. . . . Not all the soldiers agree with it. But you need to leave those [opinions] aside. If you don't agree with it, you'll do it with even more sensitivity.

It's all about using the brain and not using the muscles. That's the difference between this and war. There is no enemy in this situation. . . . This is taking Jewish people out of their houses because this is what the government decided to do, and we are the army of the government of Israel and this is our job.

No one knows what I think about it, and I leave that out of it. . . . To prepare my soldiers, I explain: ''You don't need to take it personally. They don't know us." I accept this reaction from the settlers.

I want everyone to know that all the Israeli soldiers are doing it whether they like it or not. . . . So don't think that it's an easy thing to deal with.