Tenant-landlord relations in the recession

First, keep in mind that legally, she could have paid the rent after the 3 days had passed, and you couldn't do anything. I'm guessing she had already mailed the check and that's why she had to ask you to hold it.

Second, from a purely business standpoint, she made the right decision to pay the dentist. She has a history with you and she's already living in your apartment. You are not going to kick her out for being a few days late on the rent. It's way more hassle than it's worth for you to lose a good tenant (or even an OK tenant) for something like that. A dentist, on the other hand, has nothing to lose by alienating a patient with an overdue bill. The can send the account off to collection without even a thought. [Also, this is not true for all dentists, but I've encounted more than a few that resort to high pressure sales tactics and insist on payment the day of service. If you have an emergency you're basically screwed]

I'm with you in treating housing as the #1 priorty, but sometimes you're just in a bind. I bet she was very embarassed to have to ask you that. I would be. But by not making a big deal of it, I'm sure you earned way more in loyalty than it cost you in dollars.

I have one tenant who struggles with her finances. She is always a little late with her rent. But she always pays. She took a second job recently, so I know she takes her obligations seriously. She's quiet, clean, and I trust her (I'm a resident landlord, so that's important). Maybe I'm being a pushover too, but I also know that I'm in the financial position to be a little flexible. The golden rule, I guess. If things got tough for me, I'm behaving as I would like someone to behave toward me.

My opinion Rona, you're being smart. I go out of my way to accomodate my tenants. When they ask for something fixed, I fix it as soon as is reasonable. When they're a day or two late with the rent check, I don't say anything. When they want to make a small change to something that can be easily changed back, I say sure.

Why? Because they're nice people, sane and reasonable, they communicate issues with me, and they're in no danger of missing a rent payment. These are important qualities at any time, but in the current climate they're invaluable. As a relatively new landlord I have many fears of what can happen, and I know how difficult someone can make your life. I have no desire for difficulty and drama. As a result I'm willing to bend over backwards for these folks, and just hope they want to stay.

I have been in this situation before. I was previously a renter, and my wife and I had a very good rapport with our landlord. At the time, we had been living in our place for approximately 2 1/2 years, and my most recent credit card payment took abnormally long to clear our account. During the waiting period, I had already sent in our rent check. When I checked my account online, I realized that my rent check may clear a couple days before my next paycheck and I would come up short.
Put simply, I should have been more careful when scheduling payments. However,I had a quick chat with my landlord and she agreed to hold my check for a couple more days. We had never been late before, I have a steady job and reliable income, and it was a quick fix. Although it is tough to mix business and personal relationships, in the case of a landlord/tenant relationship, it becomes inevitable. I was a more appreciative tenant as a result, and I'm sure my landlord appreciated having a steady renter for over 4 years.

Good business people. You can't be all about the profits, or else you'd be make a terrible business person. There is a customer-service side of running a business too, and you just showed it. Pat yourself on the back.

Listen to Tracey Benson. You need to have a talk with your tenant. Perhaps the situation is nothing to be concerned about. She may have had an unexpected major procedure, not a teeth cleaning, from a dentist who demanded immediate payment right at the desk (many do, these days). Or the dental problems could be a complete fabrication. Or anything in between.

But you do need to assess whether she's got serious money problems--or whether she just decided that you're easy to roll.

I don't think it is a a choice between "serious money problems" and "easy to roll." There are some steps in the middle there, and a good landlord takes the trouble to recognize that. As a landlord, you don't want tenants who take advantage or who have big financial issues and can't make rent -- but you also do not want to drive away a good tenant who has always paid who, one month, asks for a 3-day window of time. Every once in a while, many people run into a tight month.

If this tenant falls into this last category of someone who has always been a responsible tenant, the last thing I would want would be to drive her out with a bad attitude.

jlen, my comment referred to Tracey Benson's advice, which you can read in Rona's post.

The woman should have bought a house instead of renting. She could spend months there before the bank started foreclosure proceedings!

In all seriousness - where is the compassion for renters in this massive taxpayer funded bailout of homeowners (other than the compassion shown by the responses here)? A renter is a few weeks late with rent and a landlord can start eviction proceedings; yet an individual with a mortgage on a property has politicians tripping over each other trying to be the first to provide handouts and "keep people in their homes". If housing is such a fundamental right that the 67% of Americans are homeowners require taxpayer assistance (in the form of tax credits and deductions) to remain in their homes, why do 33% of Americans get little preferential treatment? Or is this a case of tyranny of the majority (as someone once said: democracy is two wolves and a sheep deciding what is for dinner)?

In Rona's case, having a talk with the tennant ("trust but verify") to make sure this is a rare occurance seems the right course of action - and even better - it didn't require any additional laws being passed, but unfortunately for the politicians, it doesn't require any photo-ops either.

Hmmm, Rona: does your tenant know you write for Boston.com about real estate matters? ...

Anyway, I think the "good tenant is worthy of accommodation" tenet is obviously true. Your tenant owes you consistency, respect, good communication, etc, but that doesn't mean you're entitled to a 100% blip-free ownership experience (any more than a tenant has a right to flip out about a once-in-a-great-while maintenance issue). If it becomes a problem, then it's a problem; if it doesn't, then don't worry about it so much.

Though I have to say I agree with you & would pay the rent first in this situation, unless her "unexpected dental bill" really meant an emergency health situation that needed immediate payment to resolve. Other than those, and food, the rent must be paid before all else.

Funny, people that are facing foreclosure can go upwards of a year without making a single mortgage payment, but being a couple of days late on a rent payment has a stigma attached to it.