As usual, O'Brien led the way

The Boston College Eagles were smothering under a pile of betting slips and bad jokes when Tom O'Brien was brought to Chestnut Hill to restore respectability and honor to the football program in December of 1996.

That was back in the days when Boston's four professional head coaches were named Bill Parcells, Jimy Williams, Steve Kasper, and M.L. Carr. Here we are, 10 years later, and it's clear that former BC athletic director Chet Gladchuk made a good choice.

O'Brien became the winningest coach in BC history (69-42) yesterday when the Eagles beat Brigham Young, 30-23, in double overtime at Alumni Stadium. The victory boosted BC to 3-0 and put O'Brien ahead of Joe Yukica, Tom Coughlin, Cowboy Jack Bicknell, Gil Dobie, Mike Holovak (who turns 87 Tuesday), and everyone else who ever coached at The Heights.

O'Brien's parents came in from Cincinnati for the occasion, and when the game was over, the ever-understated coach gave his mom a kiss, accepted her warm congratulations, and whispered, ``What? We won a game."

And what a game. The teams combined for 1,018 net yards of offense. One hundred eight passes were thrown, there were seven turnovers, and the Eagles missed a pair of extra points. The game ended with everyone standing around waiting for a referee to announce the reversal of a call on a BYU pass that initially was ruled incomplete, then changed to a game-ending interception. It was at once exhausting and exhilarating.

``Just another day at the ballpark," deadpanned the Eagles' 55-year-old coach.

O'Brien's teams have been in bowl games the last seven years and won the last six. His 2006 Eagles were ranked 23d in the country entering the weekend and have a chance to be 5-0 with a top 20 ranking when they play Virginia Tech at home Oct. 12.

Yesterday's escape against the Cougars was almost as harrowing as last weekend's pulsating extra-inning win over 18th-ranked Clemson. For the second straight week, it looked like BC was going down at home, but quarterback Matt Ryan reminded us, ``We're not going to give up. That's how we're coached."

That's how we're coached.

If you had an 18-year-old son with special football skill, you would see the appeal of having him play for a man like O'Brien.

The oldest of five boys in a six-kid family, O'Brien was schooled by the Jesuits at Xavier in Cincinnati, then at the US Naval Academy, where he played in a program heavily influenced by a longtime assistant named Steve Belichick.

The Jesuits teach you independent thinking and the Navy teaches you discipline, and O'Brien has brought the whole package to Chestnut Hill. He wins, he graduates his players, and he gives young men a system in which they can grow, learn, and succeed.

Athletic director Gene DeFilippo, fortunate to inherit O'Brien, said, ``When you think of Tom, you think of discipline, dedication, and teamwork. And one of the secrets of providing leadership is surrounding yourself with good people."

Indeed, there are generals who need a posse of yes-men at their feet and then there are leaders secure enough to delegate responsibilities to a trusted staff.

``There are a lot of great people, especially in this building," O'Brien said when asked about his record-setting win. ``I have great coaches. I've said before, I think I have the best coaches in this conference. They have a lot to do with it. They recruit the great kids that have played. I wouldn't have won a game if these kids didn't play the way they did out there today."

Where does a guy like this come from?

``He tried everything growing up," O'Brien's proud mom said as she stood waiting for an elevator after her son's postgame news conference. ``I think he learned discipline at the Naval Academy and he just kept going on after that."

``Being one of six kids, you learn how to be a team player," said O'Brien. ``A Jesuit high school helps. And the Naval Academy teaches selflessness. The best way I can put it comes from a Latin expression that's written above the Navy chapel. It translates to `Not for self, but for country.' That gets drilled into you: selflessness and team first."

O'Brien's dad worked for 3M, and when the kids were young, the company wanted him to move to another city. A smaller man with a bigger ego might have made the move, but old Tom O'Brien knew what was best for his kids, so he stayed and started his own company. A nice demonstration of independent thinking, selflessness, and team first.

Rewards sometimes come late for folks like this. But then one day, you get to make a weekend trip to Boston and watch your son become the winningest coach at a school that's been playing football for more than a century. You watch him teaching the same lessons you taught him all those years ago, and you know it is a life well-lived.

Dan Shaughnessy is a Globe columnist. His e-mail address is dshaughnessy@globe.com.