Schilling says he was willing, just not able

CLEVELAND -- He never had thrown this many pitches in a Red Sox uniform, or for anyone else in almost six years. In 534 big-league starts going back 19 seasons, he'd thrown more pitches just 16 times in his career. In April? Just twice, back in 1998.

So how is it that on a 42-degree night in Cleveland, Curt Schilling at age 39 was left in to throw 133 pitches, and that was without getting through the seventh inning of last night's 8-6 win over the Indians? Kind of flouts all we've been schooled to believe about pitch counts and cold weather and aging pitchers, no?

Well, yes. According to Schilling -- and, to a lesser degree, Sox manager Terry Francona -- we have it all wrong, at least for a night. You'd be making a mistake, Schilling said, to call his extended outing risky business, and you'd be commiting an even bigger one to blame the manager for sending Schilling out there to give up a fifth (and tying) run two batters into the seventh.

The cold actually worked to his advantage, Schilling said. And if you're going to pin that run on anyone, the one created by Casey Blake's double and Grady Sizemore's single, pin it on Schilling, he said, not the manager.

''I know people are going to bash the guy in the manager's office for leaving me out there, but I felt great," Schilling said after coming out with a no-decision on a night when he was attempting to join Babe Ruth and Pedro Martinez as the only Sox pitchers to win five games in April.

''I know myself," Schilling said, ''and it came down to I didn't make my pitches. I was one hitter away from getting out of the inning."

Schilling hadn't thrown this many pitches since July 7, 2000, when he was with the Phillies and threw 135 against the Orioles. The last Sox pitcher to throw as many pitches was Martinez, who threw 136 on May 1, 2001. Seven weeks later, by the way, he was on the disabled list with a bad shoulder.

But, Schilling insisted, ''This was one of those nights where the line score doesn't match [what happened on] the field."

Cold? ''The weather was really good," he said. ''Weatherwise, this was a night to stretch. It's one of the reasons I throw the way I do in the wintertime, the workload I put myself on in spring training. The month is irrelevant.

''I really felt strong. I felt great, I felt strong. I really didn't have to work hard in any inning until the sixth. I thought my split was awesome tonight."

The Indians scored on a walk and Ben Broussard's homer in the second, and twice more in the third on a triple by Grady Sizemore, a single by Jason Michaels, and a double by Travis Hafner. The homer and triple came on good splits, Schilling said.

By the end of the sixth, he'd thrown 110 pitches, but the Indians had managed just three singles over the last three innings.

Schilling said when he came in after that inning, he looked at Francona, because he was concerned the manager was leaning toward taking him out. Francona said that's not what he was thinking. He planned on Schilling making it until at least Hafner, the fifth batter scheduled in the seventh.

''I thought he was strong, he thought he was strong," Francona said. ''Again, that won't happen every five days. Tonight the weather had something to do with it. I really had no reservations sending him back out there. I wasn't going to let him face Hafner when it got to that part of the game. But if I thought he wasn't making good pitches, I would have gotten him out of there."

Schilling had a chance to come away with a win when the Sox scored twice in the top of the seventh, but that evaporated quickly.

''To get that lead and give it back two hitters later was so disappointing," he said. ''Disappointing on a personal level, some of the things I did and some of the things they did, but it was a great win for us."

Francona joked that when he managed Schilling with the Phillies, ''We didn't go on pitches, we went on hours."

Schilling chided the media for the anticipated controversy.

''It's always been you guys, that's what you do, unfortunately," he said. ''But it's one of those things, you can't understand it. You can only go by the numbers. But like I said, I felt great, I felt strong."