Super Bowl XLVIII brought us many things, except a competitive football game as Seattle trounced Denver 43-8. The weather was great. It was snowing in New Jersey Monday morning. Mother Nature doesn't mess with Roger Goodell, either.
We even got a 9/11 Truther to liven up the post-game press conference.
Now that we cleared that up, here are 10 [other] Things We Learned During Super Bowl Sunday:
10. Peyton Manning's worst NFL nightmare has been realized
There's little mercy on Twitter or on the internet, especially when a future Hall of Fame QB gets smoked in the Super Bowl.
For Peyton Manning , the snark reigned down upon him all night. Granted, most of those taking shots at him - myself included - could not throw a pass 3 yards in the backyard. But sometimes, some of this stuff can be very funny.
Manning demonstrated his trademark class after the game. He gave credit to the Seahawks, and said he'd use this loss for motivation going into next year.
A game that was supposed to complete his legacy simply reinforced all of the doubts that his critics have leveled against him since his days of getting trounced at the Swamp in Gainesville. His 73.5 passer rating in Super Bowl XLVIII was the lowest since Rex Grossman in Super Bowl XLI [68.3]. That was the Super Bowl won by Manning, by the way.
This was also shared during the game:
Peyton Manning is starting to get desperate.. pic.twitter.com/Bzp9JqnraH— NFL Memes (@NFL_Memes) February 3, 2014
As was this:
So much for Peyton's "Duck Dynasty."
9. Taking the train wasn't a good idea
The waits to get on the train at the Secaucus N.J. Transit station, and again after the game at Met Life Stadium, were up to four hours for some. Before the game, some in the crowd suffered injuries at the station and had to be treated by paramedics.
After the game, movement was equally stymied outside Met Life Stadium.
Eventually, more than 50 buses were sent to the stadium to help with post-game rush. Somewhere, someone is cursing Chris Christie.
8. "Kitten Bowl" > "Puppy Bowl"
Who won? Who cares? But the "Kitten Bowl" on the Hallmark Channel won the day over its more established canine counterpart that aired on Animal Planet. The cats shared names with NFL stars past and present, including "Terry Bradclaw," "Tim Te-Paw," "Manti Meo," "Tabby Romo" and "Tomcat Brady." Romo was sacked three times and choked in the end.
During one play, Brady, who had fumbled the snap, recovered but could not find any open receivers. Talk about art imitating life.
The highlight of "Puppy Bowl X" was a blackout during the game. It was a hilarious swipe at the NFL, especially when the power came back on courtesy of a determined hamster on a treadmill.
7. Joe Namath should have been MVP
Starting with that fur coat right out of the 1970s, Broadway Joe was a star.
His pre-mature coin flip was intercepted, since no one had called "heads" or "tails."
It was a nice precursor to Manning's night.
The coat had multiple Twitter accounts by the end of the night.
It also inspired plenty of visual creativity.
Call it a toss-up.
6. You don't need to spend $4 million a minute to create buzz
Most of the Super Bowl commercials were pedestrian. My unofficial top three are: Budweiser Troop Homecoming, the Radio Shack 1980s spot and Tebow's T-Mobile ad. Two of the three ads were "leaked" this week, removing some of their luster. Companies might want to re-think that strategy in the future.
However, DiGiorno Pizza didn't spend a dime in Super Bowl advertising, but was waiting for Manning's inevitable struggle.
It didn't take long.
Papa John was probably not happy.
There was more:
And this analysis.
Esurance aired an ad after the game boasting it saved $1.5 million, and said it planed to give away the money to someone over 18 who Tweeted #EsuranceSave30. An hour after the game, the hashtag was the No. 1 trending topic on Twitter in the United States. The winner will be announced by Esurance spokesman John Krasinski on
"Jimmy Kimmel Live!" Wednesday.
5. Cleveland can't win
Purell is based in nearby Akron. The company apologized for the Tweet, deleted the Tweet and the subsequent apologies.
4. Twitter is often fake
I HAD SAFETY ON THE FIRST PLAY IN VEGAS !!!!!!!!!! 1mm to 1.. $20mm BABY. #Unbelievable— Mark Cuban (@mcuban) February 2, 2014
On-line sports books taking action on the play had the odds of the first score being a Seattle safety at 4000-1. That didn't stop Mark Cuban from this claim that he made $20,000,000. He didn't.
J.C. Penney did this one better. Self-righteousness ruled the night as J.C. Penney posted a series of Tweets replete with typos.
Last laugh goes to the struggling retailer.
And nope, Floyd "Money" Mayweather, who loves to boast on Twitter about his gambling exploits, did not lose $10.4 million on the Broncos, in spite of this Tweet and some internet reports to the contrary:
*Betting Info* Floyd Mayweather L48hours bet 10.4Million on Broncos -2 (Action with 7 different shops + 4 offshore accts) 8Million in credit— Vegas Gambling Steam (@Pregame_Steam) January 27, 2014
After the game, Mayweather took to Instagram to refute the Twitter rumors.
Didn't this guy used to be boxer?
3. Pete Carroll is a good coach
Simple enough, but the guy was forever cursed for flaming out in Boston and New York. He build a winner at USC, with some outside help, only to have that legacy wiped out after he jumped ship to Seattle. But as is the universal case, winning is the ultimate antiseptic. Carroll, who is 62, should revel in the deserved praise he'll receive this offseason. Guess old timers aren't all clueless. The Seahawks are the fourth-youngest team to win a Super Bowl, averaging just 26 years and 162 days old per player. Carroll's time coaching in the college ranks allows him to relate perfectly to these guys.
The good news is that Pete Carroll won't have this win vacated. #superbowl— Bruce Floyd (@brucefloyd) February 3, 2014
No he won't.
Thanks poured in from all quarters, and quarterbacks:
Drew Bledsoe (@DrewBledsoe) February 3, 2014
The Seahawks did not commit a turnover or allow a sack.
Carroll puts the fun in "fundamentals."
Orange Gatorade, the under in the National Anthem [it only lasted 2:01], and the under in "Omahas," it was 28.5 and Manning
never said it once[apparently he said it twice, but no one heard it but the Seahawks], were also big winners.
2. Defense produces championships
Thanks in large part to [Denver center] Manny [Ramirez] being [Red Sox left-fielder] Manny [Ramirez], the Seahawks jumped Manning and the Broncos from the first snap of the game. The safety was the quickest score in Super Bowl history, coming at the 12-second mark.
Relentless defensive pressure eliminated Denver's running game and took Manning out of his game. It's the simplest of formulas, pressure the QB, maybe even hit him once in a while, and he'll throw up wounded ducks and be ineffective.
There was ample physical dominance on both sides of the ball being dispensed by the Seahawks, but its defense front was ferocious. The No. 1 defense literally beat the No. 1 offense. Very hard and often. Bullying was OK on the field at Met Life Sunday night. Denver's all-world offense didn't get a first until roughly 20 minutes of play had elapsed.
Old-school football and an old-school Super Bowl blowout along the lines of Super Bowl XX, Super Bowl XXII or Super Bowl XXIV.
[Legion of] Boom, that's just what happened.
1. Tom Brady will always be better than Peyton Manning
After the AFC Championship Game, there was plenty of talk about how Peyton Manning had pulled into striking distance of Tom Brady in their life-time battle for historic supremacy over the other.
12 playoff losses, 2 SB losses [where have we seen that before], 1 ring, 35-point SB loss. 5-10 vs TB/BB. #NotEvenClose— Obnoxious Boston Fan (@realOBF) February 3, 2014
Those numbers don't look good for one side.
Manning's inability to handle Seattle's pass rush was the critical swing factor in this game. That's one reason why Seattle linebacker Malcolm Smith, yes, Malcolm Smith of the Pick-6, was the game's MVP.
Malclom Smith, the first Super Bowl MVP that probably actually needs the car— PatriotsLife (@PatriotsLife) February 3, 2014
Brady beat Manning the last time they met, which cut his deficit to 10 losses in their all-time scorecard. Looking at their play in the biggest game of all, Brady left the field with the lead late in the fourth quarter in both of his losses and has three Super Bowl rings. Meanwhile, Manning engineered a 35-point-loss/debacle Sunday and threw another, late crushing Pick 6 the previous time he played for a Super Bowl ring. They did each begin their most-recent Super Bowl appearance with a safety on their first play, however.
Manning's "record" 34 Super Bowl completions reinforce the Book of Hoodie: Chapter, 2, Line 6: "Stats are for losers."
By the way, Russell Wilson was pretty damn good, Sunday. He was nearly flawless, playing within himself while moving just enough to rattle the Broncos' defense.
Meanwhile, the Peyton Manning vs. Tom Brady "debate" is settled.
22-0. It gets better. Can we FOREVER now end this drivel about Peyton Manning being on the same planet as Brady. Please #SB48— Obnoxious Boston Fan (@realOBF) February 3, 2014
Yes, we can.
And just like Super Bowl XLVIII, it was never close.
Got a news tip, want to let me know directly what you think, or have a complaint or compliment about my "aggressively relevant" content, hit me up on our Obnoxious Boston Fan Facebook page, on Twitter @realOBF or e-mail me at email@example.com. Thanks always for reading and pass the clicker.
The author is solely responsible for the content.