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Tony's Top 5 biggest lies told during baseball free agency
5
"We tried to keep him." Translation: We've milked this guy for all he's worth and he is starting to slip, so we're going to replace him with someone younger and cheaper.
4
"We think he'll benefit from a change of scenery." Translation: This guy is a nutcake, but he's a bargain. If we get a good year out of him, rejoice!
3
"That doesn't constitute tampering." Translation: We never contacted him directly. We just asked one of our former players to sleep on his lawn.
2
"There's another team involved." Translation: The market for this guy is non-existent right now, so I'm trying to create the illusion that there is actually a demand for his pathetic services.
1
"It's not about the money." Translation: Are you kidding? I'd play on Pluto for that. But while we're at it, can I get access to the private jet and have luxury seating for my family?
Tony's Top 5
Best offseason moves in recent Red Sox history
5
Signing Johnny Damon From 2002-05, Damon averaged 149 games, 16 home runs, 115 runs and 25 steals. His OPS was .803. Rock solid.
4
Trading for Curt Schilling The piece that put the Red Sox over the top in 2004. Most guys go to New York to win titles. Schilling came here.
3
Signing David Ortiz In 10 years, he's hit more homers than anybody but Albert Pujols, Adam Dunn or Alex Rodriguez. Jackpot.
2
Signing Manny Ramirez Find another $100 million free agent contract that lived up to this one. Anywhere. He was worth it.
1
Trading for Pedro Martinez Since he came in November 1997, only the Braves and Yankees have won more games.
About Mazz
Tony Massarotti is a Globe sportswriter and has been writing about sports in Boston for the last 19 years. A lifelong Bostonian, Massarotti graduated from Waltham High School and Tufts University. He was voted the Massachusetts Sportswriter of the Year by his peers in 2000 and 2008 and has been a finalist for the award on several other occasions. This blog won a 2008 EPpy award for "Best Sports Blog".
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