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"We tried to keep him." Translation: We've milked this guy for all he's worth and he is starting to slip, so we're going to replace him with someone younger and cheaper.
"We think he'll benefit from a change of scenery." Translation: This guy is a nutcake, but he's a bargain. If we get a good year out of him, rejoice!
"That doesn't constitute tampering." Translation: We never contacted him directly. We just asked one of our former players to sleep on his lawn.
"There's another team involved." Translation: The market for this guy is non-existent right now, so I'm trying to create the illusion that there is actually a demand for his pathetic services.
"It's not about the money." Translation: Are you kidding? I'd play on Pluto for that. But while we're at it, can I get access to the private jet and have luxury seating for my family?
Tony's Top 5
Best offseason moves in recent Red Sox history
Signing Johnny Damon From 2002-05, Damon averaged 149 games, 16 home runs, 115 runs and 25 steals. His OPS was .803. Rock solid.
Trading for Curt Schilling The piece that put the Red Sox over the top in 2004. Most guys go to New York to win titles. Schilling came here.
Signing David Ortiz In 10 years, he's hit more homers than anybody but Albert Pujols, Adam Dunn or Alex Rodriguez. Jackpot.
Signing Manny Ramirez Find another $100 million free agent contract that lived up to this one. Anywhere. He was worth it.
Trading for Pedro Martinez Since he came in November 1997, only the Braves and Yankees have won more games.
Tony Massarotti is a Globe sportswriter and has been writing about sports in Boston for the last 19 years. A lifelong Bostonian, Massarotti graduated from Waltham High School and Tufts University. He was voted the Massachusetts Sportswriter of the Year by his peers in 2000 and 2008 and has been a finalist for the award on several other occasions. This blog won a 2008 EPpy award for "Best Sports Blog".
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