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Oh, Montreal, How Does Thou Hate Boston?

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Le Journal de Montreal screenshot

In preparation for Game 1 of the Eastern Conference semifinal round between the Bruins and Canadiens, Marie Joelle Parent, of Le Journal de Montreal, gives her readers “11 reasons to hate Boston,” and to be fair, a couple (New Kids and Sweet Caroline) are indefensible.

But a Montrealer questioning our gastronomy in a city where poutine is treated as some sort of a delicacy? Mon Dieu.

“They also have the Norm Burger, a culinary monstrosity served at Cheers restaurant,” Parent wrote (translated via Google Chrome). Little does Parent realize that Bostonians actually frequent Cheers about as much as Expos fans used to visit Olympic Stadium. Oh, but there’s plenty more to rail against us for, including “frat boys,” which apparently makes Daisy Buchanan’s more of a “bro” hangout than the Chez Parée? Right.

Parent’s other reasons include the city’s fans (citing Drew Magary, which is like trusting Betty White on her opinion of the hot new video games) its style, snobbery, and Milan Lucic (“ Hockey seems to have found his new Sean Avery,” she wrote).

More from Parent:

Emphasis Bostonians is one of the most imitated and parodied in the United States. Generally, they drop the "r" at the end of words and pronounced "ah." Their "o" also becomes "ahh." "Parking the car" becomes "Pahking the cah." They also add "r" where there is none. The word pizza sounds like "Pizzer." They also have a unique dialect. Instead of saying "water fountain" (water fountain), they say "bubblah.

Oh, what a hoot. It's cool though, Marie. Even coming from someone who lives in New York?

Pour l'amour...

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