Ranking your favorite championships is like ranking your children. You have your favorites. You just don't tell your wife.

No, no, wait, dear, I was just kidding . . . Of course I love all of our babies equally . . . Even what's-his-name, the little pirate-looking fella with the wooden leg . . .

(NBA.com Photo)

You see, we're here today to rank our teams' six championships this decade - that's right, SIX championships - and you can bet your Loserville pennant that we're going to enjoy it.

(Editor's note: For today's purposes, we're going to pretend Super Bowl XLII never happened. Because it didn't. Thank you, TATB Management.)

So Yankees fans, you can skip out on us today and surf on over to your other favorite destination . . . what is it again, BronxChixWithMustachesTomSelleckWouldEnvy.com? Sounds right.

Lakers fans, you can stop pretending you care and again focus on your real favorite pastime: bleaching your hair, your teeth, your nostrils, your Vujacic, and whatever else happens to be the Tinseltown trend of the moment. Freaks.

And Philly fans . . . well, I don't even know where to begin with you. Moses Malone isn't walking through that door. And if he did, he'd probably drop 25 and 20 on Samuel Dalembert.

But seriously, enough about you. This is about us. So fire up the duck boats, let the confetti rain, and let's get rankin' . . .

Let's just admit it. Despite devouring all the of the mock drafts, semi-educated guesses, deliberately misleading rumors, and flat-out gossip like we're Peter King rummaging through the Starbucks dumpster, you, me, and Mel Kiper Jr. haven't a clue what the New England Patriots are going to do with the No. 7 overall selection in today's NFL Draft.

Especially Mel. There are a few memorable draft moments that stand out in my mind over the years - the made-for-TV nose dives of Thurman Thomas, Randy Moss, Warren Sapp, and Brady Quinn, Dr. Z's dismissive appraisal of Dan Marino (man, I wish I could find this on YouTube), that one time Chris Berman paused for breath - I think my favorite happened in 2005, when the Patriots selected little-known Fresno State guard Logan Mankins with the 32d and final pick in the first round.

You could just tell from Kiper's reaction that he was completely befuddled by this pick - when asked by Berman for his reaction, he looked like a deer in the headlights, albeit a deer with an awesome man-bouffant - and it was so apparent that he wanted to rip the selection; if I recall correctly Kiper had Mankins pegged as a late second or early third rounder. But bless his little draftnik heart, he just couldn't do it. The Pats, I'm going to guess you recall, were coming off back to back Super Bowl titles, their previous two drafts had been sensational, and at that moment in time it was a self-defeating act to question any personnel decisions that they made. So Kiper dislodged his tongue from his throat, stammered something about it being a bit of a reach but that the mean Mankins was a Patriots-type of player . . . then burst into tears, ripped his draft board to shreds, shrieked "I hate you, Belichick!," and stormed off to his room. Well, maybe not all of that is true. But trust me. It was awesome.