When BJ Novak was 14, he stole a Newton person’s identity in the nerdiest way possible

Identity theft is not a joke, BJ.

As revealed during his appearance on Wednesday’s The Late Show, BJ Novak went to the Newton Public Library when he was 14 years old to sift through polling records. Why would one ever do this recreationally, you ask? In attempt to discover just the right person to use for his fake ID.

Turns out, Novak, who grew up in Newton, ended up finding a guy with the same first name and initial (“Because I thought if I had been drunk — and I’d never been drunk — and I forget my name, I can’t get busted.”), managed to get his birth certificate, forged a bunch of documents in his name, went to a Massachusetts DMV, and there, they did indeed grant him a license.

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One might say this is incredibly crafty; others might say it’s identity theft. Call it what you will.

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