Meredith,

I’m not OK with the way my boyfriend behaves on social media. We are in a serious relationship, only three months in, still getting to know each other and how we work together as a couple. He speaks to women he calls “friends” on Facebook, Snapchat, and other messaging apps in ways I feel are flirty and in excess.

When we first started dating, his ex had called him and I saw messages between them with kissy faces. I saw other kissy faces were sent to “friends.” He explains that it means nothing, and that he speaks to everyone in a “loving” way like that. Last night, I found some flirty comments between him and another “friend” on her page. He also likes every selfie she posts (and she posts a new one every day!). I feel as though he is sending the wrong message to these women if he is truly being faithful to me.

I’ve told him that I feel like this is disrespectful to me and to our relationship, and that these girls are not friends – they are just girls he talks to online/on his phone. Friends are people you share your life with – you see them, you go out and do things together, you introduce them to your significant other. None of these things have happened so I don’t consider these girls to be true “friends” of his.

I’ve noticed that a lot of his flirty actions happen on social media when I am not around/busy. I think he is not getting attention from me and craving it elsewhere. This is his own issue that he needs to come to terms with, I know. But am I overreacting? Is this something that other women struggle with in their relationships? I don’t know what to do at this point, as I truly have a lot of strong feelings for my boyfriend and he has almost all the qualities I have ever wanted in a significant other, minus this issue. These actions really make it hard to trust him.

– Attention Seeking Boyfriend in Boston