I have been married for more than three decades. Six years ago I learned that my husband had been dating about a dozen women he met on a website for married folks looking to have an affair. I was absolutely shocked! It had been going on for more than a year. We each spent months in therapy and reconciled eight months later. Things were pretty stable until two years ago, when I learned he was having an affair with a new (married) women. While we were in couples therapy for five months, he continued to carry on with this woman, but lied to me and the therapist. After a few months, when I learned he had seen her again, we separated.

While separated, he started dating women he met on a traditional dating site, posing as “divorced.” I was aware but indifferent. I knew there was no other way he could entertain himself living alone. Meanwhile, I enjoyed the peace of living alone and making myself top priority. Several times over the past year, he has made attempts to reconcile. We recently spent two months living together without much conflict. Then one morning he announced he “needed space,” so I moved out. He was pretty elusive about what he was up to the weekend after I left. I just learned that while we were living together and working on a reconciliation, he met a separated woman through a friend and invited her to spend two days and an overnight at his home, which is the reason he needed me to leave. That romance didn’t work out, so he is now begging me to reconcile again.

I am exhausted dealing with this serial adulterer and his constant lies. He says he is through with other women, I am the perfect woman for him and, if we reconcile, he will make the remaining years the best years of my life – “full of affection, laughter, adventure and joy.” A year ago I had an attorney draft divorce documents, so it would be really easy to pull the trigger. I feel I have provided this guy with plenty of opportunities. How many more chances do you or your readers think saving this marriage deserves?

– Sucker in Suburbia