They are a thing! It is very possible to “fix it in post,” as the saying goes. Google “postnup” and you’ll see a bunch of people who offer this service. 

Basically, it’s a contract that allows everyone to know what’s happening with money – and what would happen if circumstances change. It can be as big or small as you want it to be.

How do you pursue this option without making everyone feel weird about it? First, maybe don’t pick the lawyer your dad wants. This is a team effort, and you and your husband are the team. Choose a professional together.

Also, you can start by meeting with a financial advisor – someone who makes you both feel OK – and ask what you might want to consider including in this agreement.

Remember, this document would be designed to protect your husband too. You value what he does at home, and this is an incredible time to show him that you’re always thinking of what he brings to the table.

I’d like to think that when a legal document is made in the spirit of clarity, respect, and protecting everyone, it doesn’t cause the strife we see on TV. 

We like to pretend marriage isn’t a contract, but it is. It turns two people into something like a business. The more we recognize that, the better off we’ll when the business changes and, hopefully, grows.

– Meredith