“I believe I am in love with him …”

Wait! So it’s possible! This is good.

Before you make any decisions about this relationship, talk to him about how you feel. Please remember that the word “love” – including the phrase “in love” – is very vague. We’ve tried to define it a zillion times here. We’ve also tried to come up with answers for people who want to know when to say it. All I know is that “in love” means something different to me than the next person. And I’ve thought it, only to realize … oh wait, “now it’s love.””

Also remember that you met this man in a pandemic, which means you haven’t seen each other in your normal routines … whatever they were, whatever they might become. I don’t think I could commit to someone until I saw how they fit in my life, with my friends. I’d need them to understand how I work in a community. Maybe there’s a bit of “waiting for reality” with the two of you. I’m just guessing here.

I mean, it’s also possible he’s lukewarm about the whole thing, but you use the word “amazing,” and he seems rather enthusiastic, so don’t make any assumptions.

If there’s passion you need to see or hear, tell him about it (Billy Joel voice, please). And remember that some people show passion with big words, but others have an entirely different language. Showing up – with great excitement – is a form of passion, I think.

If this relationship doesn’t work, I’d remember with your next experiences that yes, love takes time (Mariah Carey voice, please). It grows based on the experiences you share with someone. Some of it is just chemistry and luck. It sounds like you’re willing to put in the effort, so please, when it comes to your own feelings about whether you can fall for someone, trust your gut.

– Meredith

Readers? How long does it take for love to bloom? What is happening in this relationship?