“Guy time” means “friend time.” Rename it that in your brain. Friends are friends, no matter their gender. That should be the end of that part of the argument.

Friend time is a bit different with a significant other there. I see no problem with a person wanting plenty of independent friend time. But if you’re not getting your own quality time with him – and you feel hidden from his friends, like you’ve barely met them – that’s an issue. Like, if you knew them well because you’d all bonded at a party, you might feel less weird about his desire to see these people on his own.

Also, is he enthusiastic about spending time with your friends? No right or wrong answer here, just something to think about. Maybe he knows both of you will have a more comfortable time with your community.

But really, instead of thinking about who’s wrong or right in this situation, it’s better to consider compatibility. I think it’s wonderful for people to be able to take breaks from each other and have quality time with friends alone. But that’s me. Maybe you would be in a better partnership with someone who doesn’t separate this kind of time, someone who loves combining worlds, double dates, and thinks to invite you whenever you’d enjoy an activity. Your boyfriend really needs this space, and even if he compromises, he might not feel like the partner you want. That’s OK.

– Meredith

Readers? Problem here? Incompatibility?