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Wedding bells at the office

Q. My manager is getting married (this will be her 3rd). There are only 4 people in our department, and only one person received an invitation to the wedding because they are also personal friends. We all get along well, and there are no hurt feelings about not receiving an invitation either from myself or my co-worker. We realize you just can’t invite everyone. Should we still get her a gift because she is our boss? I would like to get her something but do not want her to think that we feel shunned at not getting an invitation. If I don’t get her anything, I feel like I am sending a message that I don’t acknowledge the event. I can’t seem to find any advice on this one.

C. H., Tarentum, PA

A. The short answer is, “Yes, you may give a gift.” Giving it from the both of you is a really good way to show her you are happy for her and that you don’t feel slighted at not being invited. You also can take a moment with her when you give her the present to express those sentiments. “Marge, Jane and I are so happy for you. We know it’s not possible to invite everyone to your wedding, but still we enjoy working with you, consider you a friend as well as our manager and wanted you to have this. Congratulations.”


Do discuss the gift issue with your fellow co-worker ahead of time. You don’t want to create an awkward situation if she wasn’t planning to give a gift. While the ideal would be for the two of you to give a gift together, don’t force the issue. If she doesn’t wish to participate, a card and/or gift given privately from you is the way to go.
Q. I have a Master of Arts in Linguistics and a Master of Arts in Educational Administration. Do I put both masters at the end of my name: Jane Doe, MA, MA?
E. K., Lake Villa, IL
A. The rule of thumb is to list one degree that is the highest level advanced degree you’ve received. Even though you’ve received two MA’s, I recommend sticking to “Jane Doe, MA” which can refer to either degree.

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