Ann Coulter Apparently Doesn’t Like Soccer, or ‘Americans’ Who Watch It

Conservative columnist Ann Coulter is not one to hold her tongue on any topic.
Conservative columnist Ann Coulter is not one to hold her tongue on any topic. –REUTERS

It’s always a treat when someone devotes an entire column to something they claim no one should care about. Especially when that someone is Ann Coulter.

Coulter, the controversial conservative pundit, took the time on Thursday to wax poetic about her views on the apparent surging popularity of the World Cup.

“Any growing interest in soccer can only be a sign of the nation’s moral decay,’’ Coulter wrote in her column that was published shortly after Team USA fell short in their match against the German national soccer team.

But she doesn’t stop there, with Coulter figuratively kicking dirt on the grave of Massachusetts “Senator for Life’’ Ted Kennedy, as well as disparaging other targets in her sights.

If more “Americans’’ are watching soccer today, it’s only because of the demographic switch effected by Teddy Kennedy’s 1965 immigration law. I promise you: No American whose great-grandfather was born here is watching soccer. One can only hope that, in addition to learning English, these new Americans will drop their soccer fetish with time.


Coulter goes on to minimize the 32-team international competition as repetitive to the point of drowsiness. Almost, some might say, similar to the same effect some extreme political columnists [who shall remain anonymous] can have on some readers.

After reading the column, it’s unclear if Coulter has any appreciation for any sport, what with her overall dismissal of baseball, basketball, hockey, and football.

She also echoes the familiar— if unfounded — complaint that the game is lacking because soccer players are not permitted to use their hands (other than goaltenders, of course).

According to an ESPN poll, 18 percent of 12-17-year-olds identified themselves as “avid fans’’ of Major League Soccer. The poll did not specify whether that group was entirely comprised of first generation Americans brought here by “Teddy Kennedy’s 1965 immigration law.’’ Nor did the poll inquire as to whether these young people watched the sport only as the result of a pre-existing “soccer fetish.’’ What’s more, TV ratings for soccer have seen an uptick as of late. But again, that could just be a result of the “moral decay’’ Coulter described.

Yeah, that’s definitely it.

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