The 55 Gronkiest things Rob Gronkowski said in 2015

There was no shortage of Gronk-isms this year.

1. “Power naps!!’’ — a Feburary 27 tweet

2. “No, I don’t know line dancing. Whenever they play the hip hop that’s when I do my moves.’’ — on Naples Fox 4 in February

3. “I’m a virgin.’’ — on WEEI’s “Dennis & Callahan’’ in August

4. “My moms home made Chicken Sue flay [sic]. Super delicious and yummy!’’ — a November 17 tweet

5. “We’re probably going to go out after, do a little dancing, get a little crunk.’’ — on Bleacher Report’s “Uninterrupted’’ in May

6. “You’re gonna get Gronk-spiked fo’ sho’…because we don’t get hyped. We stay hyped!’’ — in an April 12 Twitter video


7. On his party bus: “You can still be having fun, but maybe it’s in more of a setting where people don’t know what’s going on.’’ — in Sports Illustrated’s January 12 issue

8. More on his party bus: “No dudes allowed.’’ — on Super Bowl XLIX Media Day

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9. On something a husband might find all over the bed that makes him suspect his wife is having an affair with the baker: “Whipped cream.’’ — on Celebrity Family Feud in July

10. “I gotta get my XBox, hold up.’’ — on Super Bowl XLIX Media Day

11. On why he doesn’t use SnapChat: “To [sic] many chicks would send me pics and it would get to out of control.’’ — a November 17 tweet

12. “I love puppies. Who doesn’t?’’ — on Super Bowl XLIX Media Day

13. “‘In front of the entire country, Gronk’s spikes impacts right between my butt cheeks.’’’ — reading from A Gronking to Remember on Super Bowl XLIX Media Day

14. “I would have the pleasure to spike a football between butt cheeks.’’ — on Jimmy Kimmel Live! in February

15. “Would you do me the honors of letting me spike this onto your butt?’’ — in a July Funny or Die video


16. “All of a sudden they went hard at us, and I got pushed or something, and I was like screw it. Last game of the year, I’m throwing some haymakers.’’ — on Jimmy Kimmel Live! in February

17. “Better watch out / I’m lookin’ for chicks as hot as crocodiles / but you got to wait a while’’ — in a freestyle rap caught on Instagram, June 29

18. “Sometimes chicks are crazy…I don’t got a girlfriend.’’ — a February 25 tweet

19. “Dude, I got some Goose, you want some?’’ — overheard at the Super Bowl victory parade

20. “We’ll Gronk watermelons! We’ll Gronk honeydew melons! If it’s even close to a melon, we’ll GRONK IT.’’ — a March 31 Facebook video

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21. “Retake on tweet. Spelt words wrong I guess! LOL’’ — a March 22 tweet

22. “Chilling chilling’’ — a November 10 tweet

23. “We’re killing this mountain, baby! This mountain got destroyed by us!’’ — a March 31 Facebook video

24. On Tom Brady’s Facebook posts: “I saw him jump off the cliff. It was a great jump.’’ — to Fox Sports in April

25. On the book he wrote: “I only read, like, 80 percent of it. I know where all parts are, though.’’ — on SiriusXM radio in July


26. On Tom Brady’s pitch at the Sox opener: “I don’t know how he didn’t get it over the plate. He might have done that on purpose. I’m gonna ask him.’’ — to Fox Sport in April

27. “After 10 seconds of me dancing on top of her in the chair, the collective 520 pounds of the two of us collapsed the fold-up chair… That was the best $30 I ever made.’’ — written in It’s Good to Be Gronk, (Jeter Publishing, July)

28. “Cleaning the room out and have way to [sic] many size 16 cleats and got no friends size 16!!’’ — a May 7 tweet

29. On his biceps: “You know, these sure aren’t deflating. These are only inflating.’’ — on Bleacher Report’s “Uninterrupted’’ in May

30. “There’s only one thing you can deflate: deez nuts.’’ — on Bleacher Report’s “Uninterrupted’’ in May

31. “My drink is usually vodka with water because it gets you hydrated and drunk at the same time.’’ — in DuJour magazine’s June issue

32. On the word “eloquently’’: “I don’t even know what that word means.’’ — in DuJour magazine’s June issue

33. On being a “ladies man’’: “I mean, my screen name in fourth grade on AIM was ‘chickmagnet4life,’ so it started in fourth grade. And that’s ‘4 life.’’’ — in DuJour magazine’s June issue

34. On his ideal wife: “Cleans, cooks, makes big cash, stays at home, let’s me do whatever I want.’’ — on The Jim Rome Show in April


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35. “Heck, I still wear my favorite pair of jeans from high school.’’ — written in It’s Good to Be Gronk, (Jeter Publishing, July)

36. “The girl I had been friendly with told me that I looked like the Hulk throwing four dudes off me. She loved it and definitely made it up to me later.’’ — written in It’s Good to Be Gronk, (Jeter Publishing, July)

37. On Deflategate: “It is what it is.’’ — on ESPN in July

38. “You know, I haven’t done a Slip’N Slide in a while. I gotta do that soon.’’ — on SiriusXM radio in July

39. More on Slip’N Slide: “Well, we got really dirty because our floor was really dirty.’’ — on SiriusXM radio in July

40. Even more on Slip’N Slide: “You ever do one outside where you flip the cup? It’s called Flip the Cup. Slip and Cup? No, Flip and Cup. Slip and Flip.’’ — on SiriusXM radio in July

41. “Straight chilling and relaxing’’ — a March 13 tweet

42. “You think you’re an up and coming superstar? You haven’t even stepped in the ring yet with this monster! You’ve never faced someone with the arms of this size with the guns that scare even children that can’t even…see properly!’’ — in a BodyArmor “Gronkasaurus’’ video released in August

43. “Whose [sic] watching @Edelman11@E60 tonight? I don’t think his can top mine!! But we will see!! He ain’t wild like me lol!’’ — an October 27 tweet


44. “I should dress up as the scream guy for Halloween. Nobody would know it’s me. #disguised #halloween2015’’ — an October 30 tweet

45. On wearing socks on live TV: “I was just getting changed and they pulled me out here, and I was like,’ Yeah, I’ll go on set with them, let’s go.’’’ — on the NFL Network in October

46. “Need a haircut!’’ — a December 15 tweet

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47. On his Halo Halloween costume: “Thanks, I made it myself with milk cartons, pipe cleaners, and $60,000.’’ — on The Late Show with Stephen Colbert in October

48. On a Dolphins player posting a Photoshopped image of himself crushing Tom Brady’s head: “I think that’d be a penalty if he does that.’’ — to in October

49. “Most tasty meals [are] at 2 a.m., ever.’’ — in Dunkin’ Donuts’s “Dunksgiving’’ video in November

50. On Cam Newton: “He is a great dancer.’’ — a November 17 tweet

51. “Lipitor: If it’s hard for more than four hours, call a doctor.’’ — on Conan in January

52. “When you block someone and put them on their back, that’s called a pancake. Those are the best pancakes. Because I get hungry during games.’’ — in Dunkin’ Donuts’s “Dunksgiving’’ video in November

53. On the NFL targeting him with OPI calls: “Agree’’ — a December 1 tweet

54. “In case you didn’t know…thats me in the 87 jersey.’’ — a December 15 Facebook post

55. “I’m a 23-year-old guy just looking to have a fun time.’’ — written in It’s Good to Be Gronk, (Jeter Publishing, July)


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